Khmerbeauty 1 Life 1 Destiny

I hope no one is offended by my newest default pic.  The reason why I decided to put it up is pretty personal.  See, Rod and I had some fun with the camera.  He used one to do a MAXIM cover for me for my birthday.  I used a bow to cover up any ahhhhhemmmmmmmm body parts that may show just a weeenssssiee bit too much.  Why this pic?  Because I’ve worked sooooooo hard to earn it!  So why not?   For those who are understanding thank you….for those who don’t I can only say I’m sorry but that is the best I can do to be conservative.

I for so long don’t like what I look like on the outside.  Taking risky pictures is  one step closer to self confidence.  I’m still very shy but you know what, if I can help one buddyslimmer realize their own self worth and that our bodies are beautiful, then it’s worth it.  To be honest, I’m really nervous about having it up.  Not sure it it will be well received.  If not it’s only a delete button away.

Yesterday was HOT!  I was soooooooooooo sore from the 4 hours of exercise Thursday.

I slept all morning but did get up for the noon Kickboxing and Ashtanga Yoga. Food wise - no counting calories for the next 3 days.  I want to enjoy my 4 day weekend.

Today we are having a huge barbeque for the family.  Then we are taking off for Hollywood for clubbin.  My sister knows the promoter so we are all getting in free.
Oh, who wants to pay for an arm and a leg for drinks?  So we do it ghetto style - drink before we get there.  But I’m not drinking at all as I’m the designated driver.  I’d rather let my baby and the rest of my family drink.

I’m planning on going to a real Bootcamp class - not my bootcamp at one of the top level 24HR Fitness in Irvine.  Can’t wait to see what it’s about.  AND I MISS MY PUSH-UPS! PLANNING ON 250 REGULARS!

About alcohol - I usually don’t drink and lately just the thought of it is a big turn off.  Like today my sister made all kinds of mixed drinks and wanted me to drink.  I just don’t want any.  The last time I drank then tried to work out the next day, it didn’t go too well.  I prefer a goodworkout over drinks any day.

HAPPY 4TH!!! Eat, enjoy yourself and be safe!

Do broke people go to casinos?  Well, Monday night that would be me.  My brother was going with his girl and my mom - I tagged along.  This was after 3 hours of fun at the gym.  I got there and my mom forked over some money and  I lost it.

Then I check my brother who’s I don’t know why but playing in the Hi Roller section.  I saw a large stack and I took just $25.  I took that and made some dough. :)  Gave my mom $40 lost a bit and brought home the rest.  Nothing big, but enough for me to go to Costco to buy some strawberries, blueberries, cucumber, cottage cheese and to Mother’s for organic neccessities.

My brother, what can I say, came out ok tonight but that’s the life of a gambler  You win some and lose some.

On the way home we wanted to get Jack in the Crack.  I was thinking, how am I going to work the calories in?  Luckily we get there and there’s an Exterminator van outside.

Yep, saved 500 calories by not eating there.  Came home and gave my honey some money so he can eat.  Yep, poor guy is sooo skinny!! Weighs about 165 lbs if that right now!

It’s 2am and I’m tired.  I think I’ll eat a snack because I pushed my mom in that wheelchair all evening.  It’s a great thing these casinos are 1 to 2 hours away; I would be broke every day if they were any closer.

Tonight I have a 5K run planned - but Blaithin it’s at the gym.  I’m tying that in with an hr of weights and finish off with yoga.   I hope to get under 28 minutes this time for the run.  Wish me luck coach!   Oh, also have 300 push-ups regular planned!  I know I can get back into the higher count!

Fountain of youth is not a fountain or a pill………..its loving yourself, eating good nutritious food AND EXERCISE!  It’s about taking care of yourself everyday.  I’ve gotten carded more times now then I ever did in my 20’s when I was fat.  No pills for me - just give me some self love!

What’s a better to end a Friday then taking two great classes?  It was soooooooooo muuucccchhhh fun!!!!  KICKBOXING AND HIP HOP IS ON!!!!!!

HIP HOP takes II was much better then day 1!  I’m not as scared to be myself as I was last week.

Yesterday I used the BOSU and did this side to side low stance move on the black side.  Oh my I was feeling it in my sides like crazy today.

Anyhow, it’s on here.  I did two 5K’s this week.  My other cardio goal was to get back to a 10K.  I will do it tomorrow.  No excuses.  The new running shoes are broken in.  I’m going to go to bed early and get an early dawn run in.  This will be the first 10K in about 2 weeks for me.

I’m not sure what happened the last two weeks; my interest in kickboxing came back and been pushing my run to the side.  Well, I can’t do that if I have two 5K’s to do and with Blaithin in my head telling me I can do a 1/2 marathon, I’m a bit scurred.

I hope tomorrow early morning my report is the 10K all run is in.  NO, I know that will be the report.

Then in the afternoon I plan to do Nancy’s custom bootcamp!! WHOO HOO!!!  Feels good to be on track again and again.

But I do know where I’ve fallen off the wagon with in the past 3 weeks - my yoga classes!  I went from doing 7 days a week to maybe 2 days a week. :(  I just keep running out of time but no more.

My mom, found out an operation is in the making to remove her feminine parts.  She’s scared but I told her to go for it.  It will save her life.   I feel bad;actually I’m having a hard time dealing with it all.  I don’t want to think about losing her on the heels on losing such great people.  But I will have faith it will all work out. 

  Michael is/was one of the greatest artists of all times.  He’s an amazing person.  So sad to see the last years of his life go down as it did.  50 years old WOW!  Per TMZ he passed away from cardiac arrest this afternoon.  But I better keep my mouth shut till they confirm it. Anyhow, that man was self destructive; even so his music is legendary. I grew up on it.

May Farrah rest in peace.  She was such a fighter.  I talked to my boss about her anal cancer. He said oregano would of helped and Stay away from the doctor.  Not sure if I believe it but you know, my boss is rarely wrong.

Well, just hearing this news puts me to shame for acting petty and getting upset over stupid work related issues.

I’m going to give my loved ones a call and tell them I love them. 

Life is too short to get upset over small issues.

I need to get to the gym and work out these pent up feelings; I don’t deal well with anger. 

So glad I can get a weight session in; no interval training just pure weights and a 5K run to follow.   

Some of his songs:

“Thriller”

“Wanna Be Startin’ Somethin’”

“Beat It”

“Don’t Stop ‘Til You Get Enough”

“Billie Jean”

“The Way You Make Me Feel”

“Smooth Criminal”

“Bad”

“P.Y.T. (Pretty Young Thing)”

“Black or White”

“Man in the Mirror”

“Rock With You”

“Remember the Time”

I should be in bed but I forgot I haven’t been on here all day!

Friday kickboxing was the shi*!!!!!  I had so much fun!!! But I did not make it to HIP HOP! I chickened out. OH WELL, I have another Friday to do it.

Saturday morning I thought I should take the day off from exercise.  I didn’t get up to eat early like I would on days I do exercise.  10am rolled around and it’s still cloudy out.  I decided why not right?  After adding some of those little electrolytes pack thingies to my water I took off for a 5 mile run.  Yes Blaithin, I took it outside.  But it was horrible.  First mile I couldn’t do, second, third, fourth and fifth.  I did not have my usual level of energy.  Came back home and did some yoga by the poolside.  That is until the two nephews started doing it with me and the two yr old was sitting on my head during pigeon pose.  That was the best part of it.

I WILL NEVER EVER EVER EVER EVER RUN WITHOUT EATING MY USUAL BREAKFAST OR PRE-WORKOUT FOOD!!!

How do people exercise without eating?  I don’t understand it because I just can’t!!! NO WAY NO HOW!!!! I’m fit and I felt like that was the first time I ever ran in my whole life!

We went to a wonderful show and dinner with Pirates and all that good stuff with my whole family.  We had such a great time.  I ate everything from appetizers, to the full dinner, ate off my two nephew’s plate and brought the rest of my food home for tomorrow’s lunch.  I did not worry about the calories.  AHHHHHHHH that was the first time I had mashed potatoes in forever!!! And chicken strips!!!  And little sausages!!!! Yep, all the little kids food!!

Sunday, I’m getting up early, eat a large breakfast so I can do my own BOOTCAMP workout!!! OH YES!!  My bootcamp workout consists a lot of free weights with 2 min cardio kicks in between sets.  I also use the BOSU, the stability ball and medicine ball.  The great thing with using the Aerobics room after all the classes is the SPIN bikes is in there and I can jump on for the cardio kicks.  I also love doing lunges across the room with 30 lb weights which is light but walking lunges takes more effort then stationary ones.  Oh and my lovely lovely push-ups!  Then yoga to finish off my morning.

It’s early morning, no way am I going to catch up on blogs, forums and what not.  Will do so Sunday. MISSED YOU GUYS!!!!

LAKERS WON BABY!!!!! OH YAY!!! OUR FISHER TOOK IT INTO OVERTIME WITH A BEAUTIFUL 3 POINTER AND WE WON.  3 GAMES DOWN & 1 TO GO!

My night was not the best but I made the most of it.  I come home to some bad news, PLAN B for my run went out the door.  We watched the Lakers beat the Magic and man I jumped so high into my honey’s open arm when Fisher made that 3 Point shot with 10 sec. to go.

PLAN C  for a gym tredmill run  went out the door because the Lexus wouldn’t start and Rod couldn’t save my parking spot.  If he didn’t I won’t leave in the other car.

So I said, honey, can I go for a run on the streets??   He knows he can’t stop me from going EVEN if he wants to.

I have to tell you the first mile was hard again.  What’s worse is once I left the busy market area and got into the residential area there was less street lamps.  Blaithin, you would be very proud of me!!! Only thing I was like dang, I’m not sweating because it’s very cool outside, but the moment I came in I was drenched in sweat.  WHOO HOOO!!

Yep, I turned my a$$ around right quick for fear of safety.  All in all I only did a 5K run.

Tomorrow  I plan on visiting an old Kickboxing instructor, do her class and then try my hands at Hip Hop.  YIKES!!! I Will DIE!! I have to left feet!!!!

Food wise I’m on it!!! WHOO HOOOO!!! Got all my fruits, veggies, water, protein, sodium, fat and carbs in check!!

Well if you live in Cali, that’s one month of RENT for ya!! Yep, we just signed on our new lease for the next year. Went up to $1900 per month. For 1100 sq feet, 2 bedroom one bath, yay - it hurts! The perks? I live in a gated complex with a pool literally right outside my front door. I am 5 minutes away from Disney. So close I can hear the fireworks every single night. I’m 10 minutes away from Newport Beach, 45 min from LA, 1 hr or so from San Diego, 2 hrs from the mountains, 4 hours from Vegas.

I didn’t want to get up.  Didn’t want to leave the comfort of my bed but I have something to prove to myself - have to do it.  One pant leg at a time, one shoe lace tied at a time.  As much as I didn’t want to it this morning  I just went.  After the warm up I still did not want to wake up.

But along the first mile of running I felt my spirit soar.  One foot in front of the other one step at a time.  When I made that turn to go back home 2.4 miles I had two choices - run it or walk it, I ran the whole way through.

I timed it Blaithin!! I did the run part 3.4 miles in 31 minutes! I used my music as a stopwatch.  THIS IS MY FIRST TIMED OUTSIDE RUN AND I LOVED IT!  The mile walk was my warm up and cool down.  Whew, morning was the shi*! :)  Blaithin, now my run is faster on the treadmill, but I will start shaving time off in the coming weeks.

I realize today that I’ve been depressed probably for the past month but didn’t recognize the signs till recently.

But as always, I refuse to allow anything to stop me from doing my thing.  Got my run in, then Ashtanga yoga later in the morning.

Oh, this evening I’m having so much fun with the WII FIT!!!!  Um, still can’t dance but I will sure try.

I won’t pretend and say I feel like myself just yet.  But just like my run, one step at a time I will get there.  Thanks to all who supported me yesterday.  Meant alot.

Coming from a very abusive relationship with the ex, including let’s see -physical violence, like one day we fought and he used his Timberland’s to grind me into the ground. Ummmm roommate calls the cops and I cover it up.  Oh, the marks were there for three days; then there’s the non communication amongst us, he smokes his weed, goes out with his friends, screws other women then comes home to me………………..etc. leaves little room for finding true love with a good man.

Now - to my prince!  Can I call  him that? LOL I love him so much!!!  Now this man, would want to hurt any man who even dares try to move a piece of hair on my head.  He is my bodyguard, my baby!! He is my lover, my best friend and he loves me with every once in his body!!  I have to say, this weekend we reconnected on a whole new level.  Just me relaxing more and learning to let stress go, live in the moment, DRAMA LESS - dawg - gotta throw that in yah know CUZZ some people wants to bring it my way - that’s right!!  With all that, we just took our emotional and mental relationship to a  whole new level.  We went, got a room in LA and just spend time being a happy couple.

I LOVES IT!!!!  Sometimes I pinch myself to make sure it’s all real.  Like, dang, that man is real!!! Fo’ sho’!~!!   Gotta throw a  little somethin’ somethin’ in. LOL

Anyhow, no one is gonna slow my roll, not in life, not anywhere.  Oh yah, saw “tough love” mentioned a few times, yah I give tough love because I care.  Why I put it in my recruitment - because sugar coating anything will not help an individual get to the next level.  NEXT ISSUE PLEASE!!

I loved Tuesday night!!!  I got in my own weights session in with the BOSU, ran 1 mile at 9:10, walked at a 10.0 incline for a mile, then I just did a SET class for  an hour.  Set combines step and weights.  Because it’s I did 60 min of weights already, I used very very light weights and focus more on cardio.

Just for LOL, gotta share with you I love love sunflower seeds.  It takes forever to eat and I love cracking them and eating them and very healthy too………. ‘cept one day Rod was watching me and he said I spits my shells like a dude! HEHE  It’s all good.  I’m a tomboy and I likes it like that.  Can’t change me there!!!

AND THIS MORNING -  RIGHT NOW 5:37 AM I AM STRAPPED AND READY FOR A 4.45 MILES OUTSIDE!!!! BRB!!!!  Blaithin, catch you in a bit.

Update for me: YEP YEP, got 1 mile of warm up and cool down in. RAN THE FULLL 3.4 MILES WITH EASE!

In this virtual world what we write is  a reflection of us.  For someone like me who is in introvert, being here has opened me up.  It took me about 8 months before I truly had a voice.  I write my blogs for me and those who are open and interested in my life.  That’s what a blog is, a place for us, any of us to have free speech.  Whether or not it’s boring, that’s not my problem nor do I care.  I chose to open it for the public to read.  If you don’t want to read my blog, then skip it - there’s 100’s of blogs written each day!  Go read and support those blogs.

Whether I get one comment, no comment or 10 comments, I’m doing this for me and that one other person who is looking for support.  If that one person happens to be 30, well, guess what, I did my job as a buddy.  The key word is buddy.  I am that, your buddy, your friend, should you have me.  Should you not, then please, stay away from my page, my blog, my comments.

Whether I spend 5 minutes here or 5 hours here, God gave me the freedom to be me and do as I please.  No one will ever stop me from speaking my mind, loving my friends here or giving support.

My skin, that WAS thin, is a bit thicker.  It takes a lot to get through now.

Friends, the ones who has been here with me each day, YOU MEAN SO MUCH TO ME! I’M HONORED TO BE YOUR FRIEND.  No, you can’t shut this girl up.  She will take her time to spend getting to know you, to know those who are willing to take my hand and take this journey together.

Day 1 Back to outside running

Day one of my marathon training and I’m on course.  With Blaithin, I love Little Flower, in my head, I strapped on my shoes and just went for it.  No excuses.  Girl, I did it mama.  After my warm-up and stretch, I had a hard time getting into a running groove, but after about 1 mile, I found it…yep you would be proud of me.  I set a goal for a stop light, surpass it and kept running.  I did about 4+ miles of run with about 1 1/2 mile of walk in between if that.  With my buddies cheering me on in my head, the excitement of a race, the desire to perform well and some great music playing in my ears, I ran and loved it!!!!!!!

Running outside is a bit harder then the treadmill, but today I enjoyed it more.  It’s all about our mental state.

I hunger to succeed and I will.

Day 2

Back to strength training and my push-ups tomorrow morning and yoga at night.  Yep, took almost 6 days for the soreness in my shoulders to go away.  Boy, I need to do that Pilates class again.

Foodwise, this is the last day of no counting holiday.  Tomorrow, I will be back at it.