From one extreme to another I visited ANAPRO websites; Who made the rule no food after 7pm?
Finished the rest of my cranberry juice and I was not anywhere near normal. Here I am going to work and exercising as if I have no problem. Tuesday morning it all came crashing down on me. I couldn’t wait till the next day let alone Friday for my appt. I went to an Urgent Care Center and got the antibiotics - as Holly so noted CIPRO and a painkiller for something else. I don’t like doctors, don’t like being probed like an animal. Let’s keep these fingers cross my pap smear comes back clean on Friday. Last time I went to the doctor’s was the day I tore my groin muscles and that was over 2 1/2 yrs ago.
On the way out I was curious how much all the procedures costs - had I not been with Blue Cross it’s $350 versus the $40 copay. I was used to having an HMO $5 or $10 co-pay with my other companies. So Yumika, girl, I feel you on the high price of healthcare. I do appreciate what I have now.
Night #4 and I’m still winning big time! I REFUSE TO GIVE IN TO RODNEY AND LET HIM WIN! :) I have to say it’s gotten a bit easier not eating after 10pm if I eat right before 10pm. This gives my body 8 hrs before it sees food again instead of say 11 to 12 hrs of my cutoff time is sooner. I wouldn’t survive if my cut off is 7pm - I would probably naw on my own knuckles hehe. Who made that rule anywayz? It’s better to find out on our own what works.
I visited an Pro Anorexic website by chance darn computer and it’s randomness. Its astounding and astonishing, shocking quite frankly too scary to read some of the blogs on the site. I used to be bulimic but wow, nothing like what I read from pro “Ana” people. Some people creates an alternate personality out of anorexia. Some treats it as a “friend” or “lover”. Some goes on 35 days fasting, one girl - my heart just cried for her, would eat a yogurt, head to the gym and work out for 4 to 5 hours. Then eats some cottage cheese, then feel so guilty she goes back for another hour.
QUOTED FROM SAID ANAPRO SITE:
“To attain this golden victory, I had spent five months working out daily, doing hours of cardio every day, sometimes not even taking my allotted one day per week of rest. For months at a time I went vegetarian without even meaning to - I just didn’t get any meat in my diet. I absolutely starved myself of calories… on the “best” days I took in less than 500 calories, sometimes as low as 250 calories. I got very good at structuring my eating so that I was “munching” on something all day (such as an apple cut up into 8 pieces, eating one piece every hour) to convince myself I could not possibly be hungry. If I thought I was becoming hungry, I would punch myself in the stomach or force myself to do crunches until the wretched craving for food went away. “
“FINALLY! I behaved for one day. I actually burned 700 extra calories at the gym today; that is, 700 more calories than I consumed all of today.
Ok, so I cheated a bit. I think these super-heavy workouts are the downfall that’s leading to these crazy binges. The extreme deficit of calories is no match for my willpower, and when all the carbs are gone yet I still force myself to keep going on the treadmill, my body tries to shut down, all my muscles go weak, and my stomach is relentless. Unfortunately, this has led to some big binges in the past five or six days, nearly 1000 calories some days.
So today I made PLANS to cheat, just a little. Not so much that I can’t burn off at least twice that at the gym, but just enough to be able to look forward to, so my body is fooled into thinking I’m not depriving it. I’ve been doing some research on “snacks under 100 calories” and “the best post-workout snacks.” Luckily, something came up in common that’s already in my kitchen, no extra spending required.”
Now, I’m posting this because it’s a reminder of how extreme some of these food addictions can be. For me I always overeat but in some ways, I can relate to her struggle except mine is the opposite. Like her I do think about food a lot! What I’m doing with the challenge between Rodney and me, it’s slowly helping me free myself from the grips of food addiction starting with the hardest to kick. One day at a time right?
I know these disorders are diseases and many women do die from them. Other than that I’m at a loss for words. 
I’m just glad I left bulimia behind and used it for 1 1/2 yrs to deal with the downfall of my marriage.
I hope the drugs don’t make me too dizzy for my kickboxing and Pilates class. I’ll find out when 6pm rolls around if I can do it. If not, there’s always tomorrow.
Wow, that is amazing. It is weird, it is another form of food obsession. I have that issue myself, but the opposite, like you said. I don’t even know what to say. It makes me angry that so many women have some form of an eating disorder. What is that all about? Mine is just one of many different kinds.
It’s really sad that instead of looking for help, those women are looking for SUPPORT for destroying their bodies.
“Help me destroy my body??” Um… no. I can’t even comprehend how a person can function with calorie deficits of those magnitudes. Heart is crying right now for them.
Good luck on your eating challenge Nancy. Hope your back to feeling 100% yourself SOON and kicking butt at all your classes.
I think that when people are that extreme it’s more about control than dieting. That’s the only thing in their life they have full control over. I don’t get the not eating after 7 rule, my Doctor said to eat something like grapes right before bed to keep my metabolism going. I also hear on fat2fit podcast that some people are setting their alarms to eat every 4 or 5 hours.
It is very sad. That is something that we deal with a lot at school. They always come up in clinical rotations. makes my heart break. It is a psychological thing. So glad that you left bulimia behind. Kick Rod’s arse, girl!!!
I don’t like docs too. Anorexia is a disease a horrible disease. I agree it’s about control too.
Hope you feel better soon. People are pretty extreme either eating too much or starving themselves. We do stress a lot about food which is why I think we all struggle with our weight journey. Good job on your challenge.
That really is sad to read. I can’t see myself not eating..its just impossible. But I can see how people get out of control trying to fit into society’s idea of perfection.
So sad but true! Thanks for sharing!
Hope you are feeling better!
HUGS
thats so sad that women feel that awful about being “fat”. like i always tell myself, i may be “fat” but at least im not stupid. no cure for stupidity, LOL.
It’s a hard thing to go through and even harder to stop. Glad you were able to leave bulimia behind!
Hope you feel better soon!
Yikes, both bulimia & anorexia scare me… my father (yes, you read that correctly) was actually bulimic when he was younger. It’s rarer in men, but it does still happen apparently. I’ll stick to getting healthy the HEALTHY way! Good for you for doing it too!
Wow that is scarey stuff. It shows too that tere are extremes in both direction and we just have to be careful and pay attention.
That is scary, my hart aches for them. It is amazing how eating disorders can so easily screw us up from on extreme to the other. I know I am just as sick as she is with 200 plus extra pounds on my 5 foot 2 inch frame.
Thanks Nancy I love how you continue to find new things to make us think.
I hope those meds work for you and that u feel better, Nancy !
i am sooooo glad you got some meds. now you will be better. i hear ya on the healthcare and the dr thing. i hate PAP’s..
it is sad about the eating disorders.. i look at myself and think my body is sooo fat and outta shape. but there is no way i could go without eating. food is always on my mind and if i am hungry… DAGNABIT!! i am gonna eat.
i am sooooo glad you got some meds. now you will be better. i hear ya on the healthcare and the dr thing. i hate PAP’s..
it is sad about the eating disorders.. i look at myself and think my body is sooo fat and outta shape. but there is no way i could go without eating. food is always on my mind and if i am hungry… DAGNABIT!! i am gonna eat.
I’m also glad you didn’t wait any longer and I hope you are feeling better quickly. I’ve watched a couple of lifetime movies about anorexia before. It is so devastating. It’s also heartbreaking for their loved ones.
Good Morning Nancy, my comment disappeared;) Also I sent you an email.
I hope you are on the mend now and will feel better very soon.
As for the blog you posted I almost cried. for these women it is all about controling their life and my heart aches knowing these women can die.
With all the education out there I do not understand. My daughter weighs 112 pounds soaking wet and she just a couple days ago showed me her rolls haha I told her there are none. She think she is fat. UHM.. where does that come from?I think me and trying to change. But she is thin. yes she has gotten somecurves but well sheis a girl. she is bound to get some curves… I am worried she will absess about it but I am keeping an eye on her. She eats plenty so she is okay but what happens when she is in college?Scar
That’s so scary reading that young woman’s blog…I kept thinking to myself - what is her goal, to kill herself? Good thing my goal is to be healthy and the leanest I can be while still being healthy…I’d never want to damage my body the way she’s going to, God only gave me one! I don’t know what’s going on with you health wise but I hope your appointment goes well and you feel better soon.
I have no idea how a body could work out for 4-5 hours with NO FUEL…I have never understood anorexia…It makes me so sad…
That story was so sad to read may god help them through that time of her life. Glad you realized the healthy way or you would be there instead of gracing us with your beautiful self here everyday!!
You’re in my prayers and I’m hoping the antibiotics are working. And take it from an old lady….don’t skip your annual pap or mammo!
It is truly sad to read such stories. I can’t imagine the tormented mind and pain that would cause a person to do that to themselves…..but some folks would say the same thing about people who overeat and become obese??
Before finding this site a similar pro-ana site was the first one I came across. I found it so hard reading some of their stories and how one another were encouraging the other to starve herself, chew and spit, and resorting to laxatives. It is so difficult watching people do this to themselves.
Never knew what pro-ana meant…but I know what anorexia is. I remember my mom watched a move about a girl (I bet she was in her late teens, high school age) she was a gymnast, you know the kind that balances on bars and stuff?
Well every morning at training they weighed these girls and put alot of pressure on them. She learned that one girl kept think by not eating and so she also developed anorexia.
She exercised a ton with her friend (who would also become anorexic) and for food they ate barely anything. To avoid hunger they ate pieces of ice and little things like that
Yikes! Looking back after learning everything about being healthy, I assume she should have eaten more even if it meant weighing more. I mean, if she ate to fuel her workouts, she would perform better. Furthermore, if she built healthy muscle, (especially upper body) she would perform the upper body exercises better, I would assume? But nope, and I bet in the end she actually lost muscle…
That’s just an interesting new perspective for me since when I was in high school I thought not eating would help me lose weight. Like I would sleep all day during the summer because when I was sleeping I was not hungry. I would also wake up at 1 p.m., starving and grab a hand full of cookies…then I hated myself, and repeated it the next day.
In high school I tended to skip lunch at school. I never liked the lunches they provided since it was mostly meats I didn’t eat (if they have salad, turkey or fish I would eat it) that never helped me lose weight either
I am glad you went. You should get better fast.
I have looked at those pro-ana sites before just because I was curious.
I totally understand what you mean, I am addicted to food. I think about it all the time and even when I eat I am thinking about what I will eat next. I remember being like that for so long, even when I was little my mom would say “we just ate, don’t worry about your next meal”
I really do think it’s an addiction.
oh gosh that anorexic girl sounds just like me few years ago, it was so scary reading that,i’m so grateful for being able to stay healthy
Hope you are feeling better. That anorexia is so scary. I am just the opposite, totally addicted to food. Crazy huh?